I just added this one to my running list:
"Somebody ought to take a pine top and a bucket of slop and run her out of town."
That's what you say about somebody who has really gotten on your nerves. I mean really. I get a life-sized picture of that angry woman with her enamel bucket in one hand and a switch in the other.
The word "ass" is frequently used to add spice to the old family sayings. For instance:
"I'll kick your ass and the horse you rode up on." (Another one put to good use when you're mad. I think this one should be attributed to John Wayne and just stolen by the Gholsons.)
or
"Aren't you just the cat's ass?" (You can use that one in both the positive and the negative, depending on tone of voice.)
and our favorite and most frequently used:
"She just makes my ass hurt."
There is one old family saying that mystified me for years. In order to appreciate it, you have to understand the circumstances of its use.
Here's how it goes. You are waiting for a friend to show up and they don't. Or you expect a finished product to end perfectly and it doesn't. So you lament loudly: "I just thought surely the Perrys would be here by now." ... or "I thought my cake was going to turn out so beautiful and delicious."
At that moment, this very appropriate saying is uttered and you discover that:
"You thought like Parker's dog."
For years I wondered: Who is Parker and what in the heck was Parker's dog thinking?
I mentioned this recently to my friend Susie on the tennis court. "I know. I know what Parker's dog thought," she said.
Susie was the first person I encountered who had ever even heard that phrase and now she was going to solve the mystery for me.
Amazing. Drum roll please ....
Parker's dog thought a dog turd was a dog biscuit.
------
Just one example of thinking like Parker's dog -- with no incrimination, I mean attribution.
Happy birthday Bob!
Aren't you just the cat's ass!
No comments:
Post a Comment